atomic buffalo turds
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    here's my favorite appetizer. ABT's

    you'll need:
    a dozen jalapenos (at least)
    1 block of cream cheese. (or that neufchatel stuff)
    1 # breakfast sausage mild or hot.
    1-2 packages of bacon (thin to medium cut)

    Cut the tops off the jalapenos and with a thin knife bore them out to remove any seeds and pith. Some recipes call for halving the peppers lengthwise, but the presentation is best when you keep the body intact. now with a butter knife, shovel the cream cheese into the pepper. I find it's easiest to insert the knife with cheese on it and then use the rim of the pepper to scrape the cheese off the blade while you retract it. Do this until you have about 1/2" of room left in the top of the pepper, you'll have to use a finger dipped in water (or the cheese will stick to you) to force all the cheese into the bottom of the pepper. Once all the peppers are cheese stuffed, move on to the sausage. take a spoon and scoop a small meatball sized portion of sausage and cram it into the pepper, on top of the cheese. You'll want to use enough per pep so that the sausage mushrooms out the top just a bit. Finish all the peppers similarly and grab yer bacon. I like to wrap each pepper with one whole slice of bacon, so try to get peppers that aren't too small (bacon has to be cut or double wrapped) or too large (bacon covers only half the pep). Start by placing one end near the opening on the pepper and cover the sausage (to hold all the stuffing inside), then wrap around the bottom of the pep and wind it back towards the top in a spiral shape. Don't worry if you haven't covered all the stuffing, the sausage will hold itself together, just make sure the bacon is wrapped on tight enough so that it won't fall off easily.

    To cook, set your smoker for about 275F, though these are very forgiving on time and temps. They should take about 2.5-3 hrs, but I always pull them when the bacon looks like it won't be too chewy anymore. You can use whichever type of wood to smoke with, but my favorites are maple or hickory.

    *disclaimer* smoking jalapenos takes a good deal of heat out of them, but like all peppers, the heat varies from each individual pepper. so if you're serving to a wide audience, let gradma know that there's no way to tell which ones are safe.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • ceanntceannt
    Posts: 53,828
    I have wanted to do these for a while now.... have'nt had 'em with the sausage (damn good idea!)... one of my favorite things on earth.... freaking good!
    Never attribute to malice, that which can adequately be explained by stupidity.
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    yeah, i've done them with just cheddar, just cream cheese, just sausage, and combinations of those three. this is the one i like best
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • scoobscoob
    Posts: 16,617
    Damn you guys! another thing to add to the "things I have to make that the flippin homebrew guys posted" list!
    Jesus didn't wear pants
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    I figured out a little trick today. Should have been obvious, but sometimes I'm slow. I set up a cutting board by my computer so I could assemble a batch while I watched netflix. I had my nice bright desk lamp on to grab a few pics of the process, when I noticed that if i held the pepper up to the light, they were nearly translucent. It made spotting any residual seed/pith much easier to spot.

    I'll upload some pics after I get these suckers on some smoke tomorrow.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    here's a shot of the peppers after i topped and gutted them:

    image
    DSC00256.JPG
    2592 x 1944 - 1M
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    cream cheese stuffed and sausage caps on:

    image
    DSC00257.JPG
    2592 x 1944 - 1M
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    bacon wrappings:

    image
    DSC00258.JPG
    2592 x 1944 - 1M
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    and after a few hours of smoke:

    image

    money shot:

    image
    DSC00262.JPG
    2592 x 1944 - 1M
    DSC00265.JPG
    2592 x 1944 - 1M
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • ThymThym
    Posts: 122,708
    oh lord. sweet baby jesus, those look good.
    The only thing between me and a train wreck is blind luck..... - Kenny
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786

    I figured out a little trick today. Should have been obvious, but sometimes I'm slow. I set up a cutting board by my computer so I could assemble a batch while I watched netflix. I had my nice bright desk lamp on to grab a few pics of the process, when I noticed that if i held the pepper up to the light, they were nearly translucent. It made spotting any residual seed/pith much easier to spot.

    I'll upload some pics after I get these suckers on some smoke tomorrow.



    this really helped to temper the heat. some still had a bit of a kick, but they are jalapenos, so that should be expected of them.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • viking73viking73
    Posts: 521
    Looks like I'm going to spend my bonus money on a smoker...
  • ceanntceannt
    Posts: 53,828
    I have to buy a new one..... dang fire box burned/rusted out......
    Never attribute to malice, that which can adequately be explained by stupidity.
  • viking73viking73
    Posts: 521
    Just fab a new one...
  • viking73viking73
    Posts: 521
    Firebox that is...
  • C_BC_B
    Posts: 89,068
    So, I just found out my FIL has a smallish electric smoker he doesn't want.

    That's a win for me.
    "On it. I hate software." ~Cpt Snarklepants
  • jlwjlw
    Posts: 16,454
    SeaBee said:

    So, I just found out my FIL has a smallish electric smoker he doesn't want.

    That's a win for me.


    win.
  • scoobscoob
    Posts: 16,617
    Those pics make me want to eat my phone.
    Jesus didn't wear pants
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    azscoob said:

    Those pics make me want to eat my phone.



    does it taste like apples?
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • scoobscoob
    Posts: 16,617

    azscoob said:

    Those pics make me want to eat my phone.



    does it taste like apples?


    Nope, it tastes like androids
    Jesus didn't wear pants
  • scoobscoob
    Posts: 16,617
    Batch of these in my future I think, have lots of peppers
    Jesus didn't wear pants
  • C_BC_B
    Posts: 89,068
    On the menu tonight. It'll be 9pm before they're done, but I don't care.
    "On it. I hate software." ~Cpt Snarklepants
  • jeepinjeepinjeepinjeepin
    Posts: 18,099
    I've done those before at the big Memorial Day cook we do with 50 of our closest friends and 50 of their closest friends and another 20 or so that end up finding it somehow else.
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  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786

    I've done those before at the big Memorial Day cook we do with 50 of our closest friends and 50 of their closest friends and another 20 or so that end up finding it somehow else.



    yeesh, how many do you make? two dozen seem to take all day to prep. i can't imagine doing more than 50.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • jeepinjeepinjeepinjeepin
    Posts: 18,099
    Sorry, only a dozen or two for us doing the cooking.
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  • C_BC_B
    Posts: 89,068
    Delicious. I overcooked them a bit, but the only real problem with that was extra crispy bacon. Anyway, epic good.
    "On it. I hate software." ~Cpt Snarklepants
  • C_BC_B
    Posts: 89,068
    How well do these warm up as leftovers? Nuke em? Just eat them cold?
    "On it. I hate software." ~Cpt Snarklepants
  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786
    C_B said:

    How well do these warm up as leftovers? Nuke em? Just eat them cold?



    definitely better warmed up a bit. very seldom do i say this, but nuking is ok for these.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • jeepinjeepinjeepinjeepin
    Posts: 18,099
    If you have more than a few people around there will be none leftover.
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  • FuzzyFuzzy
    Posts: 49,786

    If you have more than a few people around there will be none leftover.



    if you have me there, don't expect leftovers.
    The pinnacle of lame and awesome in one singular moment. -Lake
  • jeepinjeepinjeepinjeepin
    Posts: 18,099

    If you have more than a few people around there will be none leftover.



    if you have me there, don't expect leftovers.


    Same here. I don't know how many I could eat but if I had enough I'd be saying things like, "Stop feedin' off of me!"
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